God created women to need love and He created men to need respect. He doesn't authorize us as wives to nag, instruct, advise or correct our husbands. You're not your man's mother, mentor or Holy Spirit. You are his wife. And if you're a woman professing godliness and you aren't consistently, daily treating your husband with the respect he needs (regardless of whether he deserves it) it's sin. Actually, it's blasphemy.
Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
Did you notice that 7 out of the 8 actions are actually state of being verbs? We have to BE those things, not merely do them. Be them. To further highlight that concept, consider the opposing verbs:
1. BE SOBER
OPPOSITE: frivolous, scatterbrained, foolish
2. TO LOVE
OPPOSITE: hate, egocentric, self-absorbed
3. BE DISCREET
OPPOSITE: indiscreet, talkative, tactless
4. BE CHASTE
OPPOSITE: disgraceful, shameful, scandalous
5. BE KEEPERS AT HOME
OPPOSITE: not keeping home neat, clean, stocked; work outside home
6. BE GOOD
6. BE OBEDIENT
Being obedient is different that just obeying. The former is a state of mind/heart/will. The latter is but an occurrence.
It's a continuous battle for a man to prove himself outside the home. So when he comes home, he needs a haven of love, peace, calm, respect and support. It is the ONE place he has in this whole big, wide world where he can let go and relax. What a privilege we have to make our homes that haven for our husbands. We need to refrain from complaining. Be thankful for his presence and look for ways to endear him to us.
Consistency is key to so many things. Practice being consistent in what God calls you to do: to love our husband and children, and to BE sober, discreet, chaste, keepers of home, good and obedient Every day. Every hour. Rather than trying to "do" them when you feel like it, practice being these quality.
Similarly, doctors, firefighters and police, even when they are off duty, feel the weight of their profession everywhere they go. Unlike a janitor, it is a high calling, not just a job. And very much "who they are". Being a wife is not just a job, it's who you are. Forever one with the man you wed, the attributes listed in Titus 2 are your higher calling. They are not just duties, they are who you are.
Being your husband's help meet means that you are perfectly suited to meet his needs. When you respect him, you're meeting need #1. When you make love to him, you're meeting need #2. When you adore and care for his/your children and "keep" your home, you're meeting #3.
When we help meet our husband's basic needs, like a watered plant in a sunny window, he will grow and treat us and our children more lovingly. But even if he doesn't, our responsibility before God is unchanged. And God gives us grace to do whatever he asks.
Tomorrow is Father's Day and it's a great opportunity to show your husband that he is prized, cherished, treasured, highly loved and respected.